Porn Is Lying! (15 GIFS)

2 Dec 2021


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"Fancy sex positions are not as fun as they look"

 

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"That my Spanish teacher will sit on my face."

 

"I guess you mean “Ella se sentara en tu cara “"

 

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"That sex isn’t tiring. After 20 minutes it’s like a ran a marathon, take a a quick water break then back to the race."

 

"That’s why you should always bring a sandwich and some water."

 

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"How quickly you can get a repair man to come round"

 

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"That there could be sharks in the bathtub"

 

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"That everyone can afford spacious homes"

 

"It’s not just porn spreading that lie."

 

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"That there’s horny milfs in my area waiting to fuck. I just got scammed'

 

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"Switching between 5 different positions in the span of 5 minutes isn’t that common and usually ruins the flow"

 

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"That you need to rub the clit like you are trying to start an old chainsaw."

 

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"As somebody who was a lifeguard, a pizza delivery guy, a rock climbing instructor, a pool technician, and currently in cannabis manufacturing… I have to say… not one single time did any customer ever invite me for any sexy action…

Never taking career advice from porn ever again!"

 

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"The best job in the world is Pizza delivery guy."

 

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"You tap your dick on her pussy to prepare it."

 

"It’s a quick sound check"

 

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"When I first hooked up with my future wife, I smacked her tits while having sex… she didn’t like that AT ALL."

 

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"That sex without a condom is appropriate with a stranger you just met 2 minutes ago."

 

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"Electricians and plumbers actually show up on time"

 


1   Comment ?
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1.
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Rasmus 4 year s ago
Well, damn. All this time I thought porn was the best way to learn stuff about things. Turns out everything I hold dear is a lie. Well, except for my dick when I'm watching porn. That shit's real as fuck...
       
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